Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
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