You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize