so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
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