Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
smell my finger.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Randomize