May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
