Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
