If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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