I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
