My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
