It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Randomize