I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize
