do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I love having hate sex.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
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