How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
