3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
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