This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Randomize
