I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
