of course. lets lasso hookers.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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