I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
