I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
