We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
