I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize
