I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Randomize
