Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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