DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
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