What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
that is very illegal...i love you.
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