i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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