so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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