she looked like the before picture.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Randomize
