I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Randomize