i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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