i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
