Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
