you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
