haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Randomize
