I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I didn't notice because vodka
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Randomize
