Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Randomize
