I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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