i just had sex bonerless
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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