used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize