so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Randomize
