I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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