It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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