i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Randomize
