I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
