Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
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