Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
