I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
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