i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
