apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Randomize
