i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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