Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize